Birth of Sora

My Birth Story

by April Garcia

                                                          Photo by:       Kaiyla Rutledge

This is my home birth story. But, before I get to that, let me start by saying that this was not my first birth. I have two other children, Connor my 4 year old and Myckael my one year old, who were both born in a hospital. While neither of my hospital experiences were bad ones, looking back there are things that I wish I would have known.

After my water broke with Connor I went to the hospital. Though my water had broken, I was not feeling any contractions so they decided to put me on Pitocin before checking to see whether or not I was having contractions or checking to see if I was dilated. Had I known better I would have told them I did not want the Pitocin until my body had been given the opportunity to work as nature intended. During the delivery I suffered a 4th degree tear from the speed of pushing combined with the episiotomy the doctor had given me. Again, if I had known better I would have told the doctor and nurses ahead of time I did not want an episiotomy. Connor was a healthy 8lbs. 3oz. and 20.5 inches at birth on May 24, 2008.

I also birthed my second son, Myckael, in the hospital. I chose the same doctor I had used with Connor specifically, if for no other reason, because of the tear. (I also felt more comfortable working with a doctor I was familiar with.) I am thankful that my doctor was on the same wavelength as me in that she wanted to be sure to avoid a c-section; just as I wanted to avoid a c-section. At some point during my pregnancy my doctor and I decided that we wanted to induce me early to try and prevent Myckael from being as big as Connor was. It was our intent, and hope, that by doing so we could prevent another serious tear which could leave me unable to control my bowel movements.

I ended up being induced at 38 weeks exactly. Myckael was a healthy 9lbs. 3oz. and 21.25 inches at birth on February 23, 2011. I suffered no tearing though I pushed just as fast (because when you are in the hospital they insist you push, push, push..), but this time my doctor worked to help stretch my vaginal opening to help Myckael's head fit and she did not perform an episiotomy. Looking back, I realize my fear of having a bigger child was unfounded and there was no need for an induction. Live and learn.

"Little" Sora is my third child, first girl, and first home birth. Something I have always wanted to experience is a water birth. I never really cared if it was done in a hospital, at home, or in a birthing center. I just knew it was something I wanted. I have always had a fascination and love for water, so what could be more intriguing than a water birth; aside from the relaxing, soothing effect it is supposed to have. So, this time around I decided to have a midwife, who was referred to me by Donnetta, a former co-worker, and deliver our little girl at home via water birth.

When I had Connor, I wanted to labor and deliver drug free, making sure the nurses knew when I went into the hospital that I would not want an Epidural, but I succumbed to pressure when I was 3-4 centimeters dilated. The nurse let me know if I wanted drugs it was now or never, so I asked for Demerol. This was a very hard decision to make as it went against my birth plan. I openly cried after making this decision. The only good thing that came of it is I learned that Demerol does nothing to take the pain away. All it did was make me dizzy and allowed me to cat nap between contractions.

With Myckael, I was more open minded on the drug front. I did have some type of pain medication put in my IV, upon request, and I also asked for an Epidural. (Angel, knowing how much I wanted a drug free birth and how heartbroken I was when I had Connor but used drugs was standing next to me shaking his head no. I assured him that I was in no way upset for making the decision, this time, to use drugs.) Fortunately, by the time the anesthesiologist was ready to administer the Epidural it was too late. I was ready to push.

Part of the allure of having a home birth, aside from having the water birth I've always wanted, was the fact that there would be no temptation to use drugs. When it comes to having my children I have always wanted to use a natural approach; which is why I breastfeed and prefer to use cloth diapers, even if I do not use them 100% of the time. Unfortunately with the boys that just did not happen.

On the night of October 27, 2012 Angel and I were across the street at my friend Anna's Halloween party. While we were there I began to notice a tightening in my stomach. After a few times of this happening, and prodding my stomach to see if it was hard everywhere, I realized I was having contractions. They were not painful in any way so I was not sure if it was the start of the real thing or just Braxton Hicks. I had never noticed any Braxton Hicks during either of my other pregnancies so I had no idea what they felt like. I was excited of course because I had been ready for her arrival ever since I'd hit 36 weeks though my actual due date was not until November 9th.

I continued to have random contractions that would get closer together then farther apart, but none hurt. Slowly they started to become stronger but still no pain. On November 5th I thought for sure I was going to have her. That morning, at 5:17AM, I sent a text to my midwife, Salli, to let her know I had lost my mucus plug and had started having contractions that were a tad uncomfortable. At 6:37AM I had bloody show. I was super excited. By 1:09PM the contractions were still random but were a 2-3 on the pain scale. At this point the contractions were happening about every 15 minutes. By 5:26PM my contractions had begun to slow down and were 30 minutes or more apart. Talk about frustrated.

The next day, Tuesday, November 6th, I sent Salli a text at 7:50AM saying that I had been having contractions throughout the night. The contractions continued to be strong and some were more painful than others. I was supposed to drive out to Seguin to see Salli for a prenatal appointment that day but decided against it as my contractions were strong enough to give me pause whenever I had one. At 2:02PM I had been having contractions that were 10 minutes apart and they hurt. The contractions continued, little by little, to get stronger. At 3:30PM they had, once again, slowed. At 6:36PM I sent Salli a text message saying that the last contraction I had was at least a 6 on the pain scale.

At 12:27AM on November 7th Salli received a text saying that I had just had one hell of a painful contraction. At 12:54AM I asked how close my contractions have to be before she would head out to which she replied 3-5 minutes for an hour. I responded with "ok" and that was the last message Salli received from me. It wasn't long after my last message to Salli that I decided to go ahead and get out of bed because I knew I wasn't going to get anymore sleep. The contractions were pretty painful at that point and the anticipation of each new contraction was keeping me awake in between.

Angel and the boys were still asleep but I went to the living room to watch TV, make use of my exercise ball, and wait it out. At this point I was pretty sure Angel would not be going to work today, but I wanted to let him sleep as long as he could. I sent a text message to my cousin Karrigan at 12:55AM to let her know, as she would be attending my labor and birth, that my contractions were really beginning to hurt. I continued to labor, alone, in the living room while everyone else slept. I watched a couple of movies, Where The Heart Is and The Banger Sisters, and at 4:13AM I sent Karrigan another text telling her that today would be the day.

My contractions were around 15 minutes apart and the pain was a 10+.  Karrigan encouraged me to wake Angel up to try and help me through my contractions since, in her words, "if [he's] there for [the] fun he gets to be there for the hard part to!" I was in tears as I lay across my exercise ball breathing through painful contractions. At 4:27AM she offered to come over whenever I was ready for her company. I let her know that I was ready and she said she'd be here as soon as she got her baby girl fed and taken care of. It was after this that I went and got Angel up. (Or maybe I had him up at one something in the morning. I cannot remember.)

Karrigan arrived at, I believe, 5 something in the morning. My contractions were pretty painful but were still around 15 minutes apart. I was watching The Banger Sisters when she arrived. I believe Angel was in the kitchen about to make some breakfast. Connor was still asleep on the couch and Myckael was lying with me on the loveseat. For a good while I was able to carry on a conversation between contractions; stopping to concentrate and breath when one struck. I was lying on the loveseat, with Myckael, when Karrigan got to the house. I switched back to sitting for a while and she suggested standing or getting in the shower. I decided to go stand in the shower under the hot water for a bit with Angel. From there I went back out to the living room and kitchen and stood leaning on the table for support while Karrigan rubbed my back. That worked better for a while. She kept trying to get me to eat something but as my contractions got stronger I became nauseated; actually dry heaving, once, over the table. I was never able to eat more than a few nibbles of cheese and one small bite of bacon. Thank the good Lord I never puked. I really thought I was going to.

Gradually my contractions got to be more and more painful and closer together. Karrigan and Angel took turns rubbing my back trying to help me relax and work through each contraction as it came. Using an app on her cell, Karrigan monitored my contractions. At some point I found myself seated on the floor leaning on the couch right in front of Connor, who was still passed out. I cannot believe all my moaning did not wake him. Talk about a heavy sleeper.

It was there sitting on the living room floor, leaning on the couch clutching a pillow for dear life, when my contractions were at 3-5 minutes apart. I believe it was during this time that Angel phoned  Kaiyla. She asked him how far apart my contractions were and after inquiring from Karrigan relayed that they were 3-5 minutes apart. I believe it was at this time that Kaiyla headed over. It was also during this time that Angel asked Karrigan how long my contractions had been 3-5 minutes apart. She let him know that they had only been 3-5 minutes apart for around 40 minutes. Angel asked if we could just bend the truth and go ahead and call Salli. Karrigan agreed that that was probably a good idea so Angel picked up the phone and began his phone calls; calling Salli first. This was probably around 7AM something as it is a 45 minute, give or take, drive from Salli's house in Seguin to our house in Floresville.

After Angel called Salli to let her know it was time to head this way he gave Emily, our photographer, a call as well. So at 8AM something Salli, Emily, and then Shara, Salli's apprentice, showed up one by one. Around this time Karrigan did most of the work rubbing my back and helping me out while Angel was running around  helping everyone into the yard and into the house. He also set to work helping Salli and Shara set up the birthing pool. During all of this I'm still laboring on the floor at the couch. Suddenly I hear splashing. Connor and Myckael decided to take advantage of the new pool in their kitchen. Even in all the pain I was in, and I was in a lot, I found myself highly amused; though I'm not sure I was able to express my amusement.

Probably about 15 minutes after Salli arrived my water broke and as soon as my water broke it was pushing time. While Salli, Angel, and Shara are getting the pool set up I've already begun pushing. Once they think the pool is ready Angel helps me walk over to it, but the hot water had run out and the water in the pool was too cold to deliver the baby in. Letting slip my not so thrilled feeling on the matter, I kneel down on the floor draping myself over the side of the tub and push. After about 15 minutes of excruciating, burning pain, particularly when baby girl crowned, Sora entered the world at 9:13AM sliding into daddy's hands right there on the kitchen floor. She weighed 10lbs. and was 21 inches long.

I would be lying if I said that at no point during my labor did I find myself wanting drugs. I very clearly remember "What the hell was I thinking doing this without drugs!" going through my mind. However, now that the pain has passed and I have time to look back and reflect it is amazing what you can do when you let your body do what God intended it to do.

I remember feeling Sora moving down into the birth canal as I sat there laboring on the living room floor letting gravity and my body work together. I never experienced that while lying in a hospital bed. I didn't have to deal with being hooked up to an IV, nor did I have to listen to a doctor and nurses sit, or stand, there and rush me through the pushing process. Everything about this birth was about me, my body, and my baby. I was never checked to see how far dilated I was; though I wanted to be. There just wasn't time for that. I listened to my body and worked with it. The experience was so personal. So raw.

I will admit that my home birth was not quite what I expected. I had gone on YouTube and watched some home water birth videos and thought it was so calm, quiet, and relaxing. The birthing mother never making a peep. That was not my birth. There was moaning, grunting, and screaming. I never made it into the birthing pool. My older boys were running around making noise, or playing in the pool. Trying to talk to me while I was having contractions. (That didn't go over well.) Myckael would ask me if I was okay to which I'd respond, "No, mommy is not okay." But, it was still a very unique experience. One I am glad to have been blessed with the opportunity to experience and even more blessed to have had the support of some wonderful people throughout the process.

I think the best part about having my baby at home, aside from no medical intervention from a medical staff who thinks they know my body better than I do, was being able to sit and cuddle my new baby girl right after she was delivered. I never got to experience that with my boys. (Especially after having Myckael because he was so big they wanted to do all kind of tests on him before they would let me have him.) My boys were able to witness the birth of their little sister. It was also nice to sit, or lie, on my own comfortable couch, in comfortable surroundings to relax and admire my little girl. No pesky nurses constantly coming in and out of my room at all hours of the night, when I'm supposed to be resting. No lying in a hospital bed, in a boring hospital room waiting to be released. No unnerving car ride home hoping some crazy driver doesn't cause an accident. My husband, the boys, and I were able to comfortably sit back and bask in the glow of our growing family.

Here's the link to the video:   http://welcomesora.emilyalder.com/