Melanie's Birth Story

My birth story. I hardly know where to begin…. It seems impossible that I can sum up the single most impacting event in my life with mere words. I think I need to begin my story at the beginning. Samuel is a miracle in every sense of the word. Rich and I weren’t supposed to be able to have children. Between the effects of the chemotherapy Rich went through four years ago for cancer, and the effects of my severe endometriosis, we were pretty much told the stars would have to align, and well, that it would take a miracle. I think God likes a challenge, because that is precisely what Samuel is – a beautiful miracle.
I know countless other couples who have also spent years longing for a child, only to feel crushing, suffocating disappointment time and time again. It is such a vicious, heart-wrenching cycle. So from the day that I got a positive pregnancy test until Samuel was born, I never once took my pregnancy for granted. I LOVED being pregnant. Every day I was in awe that a little person was growing inside of me. Every kick, punch, and hiccup filled me with such a sense of wonder at what God was creating.
            “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” — Psalm 139: 13-14
At the end of October, just shy of 27 weeks pregnant, I landed myself in the hospital with preterm contractions. I spent the weekend hooked up to all sorts of monitors and was given steroid injections in order to speed the development of Samuel’s lungs in case of delivery. I’m not gonna lie. I was scared. But God mercifully stopped the contractions and I went home on modified bed rest. For the next couple of weeks I continued to have contractions more often that I probably should have, but they slowly tapered off and I only experienced normal, infrequent Braxton Hicks for the rest of my pregnancy.
I was seeing doctors in the OB clinic at Brooke Army Medical Center, but was never completely comfortable there. Finally, when I was told that several parts of my birth plan would not be honored, I fired them. I was 39 weeks pregnant. Rich and I had discussed using a midwife at a birth center, or even a home birth, in the past, but as our insurance would not cover it we decided on a natural birth at the hospital. However, at this point we agreed that we would prefer to pay out of pocket rather than use the hospital. So I began a desperate, quick search for a midwife. I felt crazy and a little afraid that I: a) wouldn’t find anyone willing to take me at such a late stage OR b) would only find one person who would do it and wouldn’t really like her, but would HAVE to use her out of necessity. Again, God was merciful and led me to a wonderful midwife who was able to see me right away, and I LOVED her!! Even if I had started my search for a midwife at the beginning of my pregnancy and had all the time in the world to make a decision, I am confident I would have chosen Salli. She was perfect for me in every. single. way.
After meeting with Salli I did some quick shopping for necessary home birth supplies and was ready to go. I can’t begin to describe the feeling of relief I had to know I was going to give birth at home and not the hospital. All of my anxiety about labor and birth disappeared! Now all I had to do was wait. And wait I did, though a bit impatiently. I am extremely grateful, however, that I didn’t experience all of the discomforts you often hear about in late pregnancy. Sure, I had some aches and pains, but overall, I felt great!
My “due date” of January 29^th came and went, but I wasn’t concerned. I knew our little miracle would make his way into this world when the time was right. Rich was away for training at Ft. Hood (about four hours north of us) since the first week of January, so he called me every day to see how I was doing and to ask if I was “feeling” anything yet. I always assured him that he would be the first to know if I though labor was imminent! I think he was afraid I would get excited and forget about him!! Thankfully, though technically deployed already, Rich’s commander had agreed to release him on a 4-day pass once I went into labor, and we were very hopeful that arrangements could be made fast enough to get him home in time once I sounded the alarm.
On February 7^th I decided to get my hair cut and get a pedicure because I realized it could be a while before I was able to pamper myself again. So I tried out two new places here in town and really liked them. After finishing my pedicure I decided to pick up a few groceries and went home to make potato soup for dinner. I was busy peeling potatoes when I had a rather deep menstrual-type cramp. I thought it was odd, glanced at the clock to see that it was about 5pm, and kept peeling! A few minutes later, the same, fleeting pain was back. It was about 5:10pm. I kept peeling and chopping! Then, about ten minutes later, another wave of pain. I started to think, “This could be it!” So I began to hurry with my soup! Once I had it simmering I made a stop in the bathroom where I noticed some blood, and I knew for sure that our miracle was on his way! I called Rich around 6pm to tell him I thought this was it, then I called Salli. At this point my contractions were anywhere from 8-10 minutes apart. Salli encouraged me to eat, try to sleep (HA!), and tell Rich to make his way home. She asked me to call her back when my contractions were 5 minutes apart. So I called Rich back and excitedly told him to come home! Then I called my friend and neighbor, Eva, who was my designated birth partner in case of Rich’s absence. I also called my wonderful birth photographer, Kara, to let her know things were (finally!) getting started.

At some point in the midst of all my phone calls my soup was finished, so I sat down to eat some. However, by this time both my excitement and the discomfort of the contractions made me less inclined to eat. I ate as much as I could because I knew I would need strength for the night ahead. I was in enough discomfort (and excitement!) that I knew sleep would be impossible (though I desperately wished I could sleep and store up some energy!), so I started cleaning the kitchen instead. Eva arrived and helped me complete a few last-minute tasks such as making up the bed with cheap sheets and a plastic cover over our nice sheets and setting out the various snacks I had bought for everyone. Once we had things relatively ready, we relaxed in the living room while she timed my contractions. She was also busy texting back and forth with Rich as he updated her on plans to get him home. I was beyond thankful when she told me some of the guys from his unit here in San Antonio were flying up to get him! After all, a Blackhawk was going to get him home much faster than a car!!
Kara, our photographer, arrived and began shooting some pictures of me laboring and joined in our chats. I really enjoyed this time of early labor, listening to music, talking to Eva and Kara, and anticipating Rich walking through the door! But I was also trying to mentally prepare myself for what I knew was a long night ahead.
By around 9pm my contractions had picked up considerably. While I was still able to chat and laugh, I found myself having to get up and walk around or lean on the back of the couch during a contraction. They were suddenly coming anywhere from 3-5 minutes apart, with some lasting up to a full minute. Eva decided it was time to call Salli, so she called and Salli said she would be heading our way.

Salli arrived at our home around 10pm and immediately checked my blood pressure and the baby’s heartbeat. Everything was perfect. I was getting very uncomfortable by this point, and it was getting harder and harder to hold conversations. I found myself having to really concentrate on my task, allowing the contractions to roll over me, breathing through them one by one.
The second best part of the night (the best was yet to come!) was when I heard the front door open and looked up to see Rich standing in front of me! I was sitting on a medicine ball in front of the couch and he immediately sat on the couch behind me and wrapped his arms around me. I cried and held him tight…. and then another contraction hit. With him there by my side, I KNEW I could do this, and I was ready!

It was soon decided that I should get in the tub, so someone (I don’t know who, but thank you!!) filled our big tub with warm water and I slid into it. It felt wonderful!! It was at this point that I completely lost any sense of time. The pain was amazing, and I had to concentrate deep within myself in order to bear it. People (and forgive me for just calling everyone “people” at this point because I also lost any sense of who was doing what for me) kept holding glasses of water up for me to sip. I knew I needed to keep drinking, but I also knew I was about to start throwing up. Luckily, someone brought a trash can in the nick of time.
I labored in the tub for a long time, clinging to Rich’s hands and drawing strength from him. Finally, Salli said I needed to get out of the tub and move around in order to help keep the baby moving downward. Getting out of the tub was the last thing I wanted to do, but I knew I had to do it. So with the help of those around me (by this time two other wonderful women who assist Salli had arrived) I got out of the tub and headed for the toilet. Many mamas find sitting on the toilet a very natural laboring position, and so did I! With Rich crouching on the floor next to me (because I did not let go of his hands!) I continued to labor. I did notice Eva taking Rich’s place at some point. Bless his heart, he needed a quick break. He had been home for hours at this point without a bathroom break or even a drink of water!

Eventually I was encouraged to move around again, so I got up and walked into our bedroom. However, I was so exhausted that I was having trouble standing up and Rich was just about carrying me. Salli suggested that I lay on our bed to rest while they refilled the tub with warm water. I agreed and crawled up onto the bed.  And that, my friends, is where I stayed. I had really hoped to have a water birth, but once I got up onto the bed, I just couldn’t move again. The pain was so intense; the thought of moving again was something I couldn’t bear. So with Rich on one side of me, and Eva on the other, clinging to both of their hands, I went through the final stages of labor.

It was absolutely amazing because Salli didn’t have to tell me when to push. I just knew. My body knew how to do everything without guidance. And pushing was wonderful!!!! Even though I was roaring through every single push, it was so exhilarating. Finally, rather than just bearing the pain as contraction after contraction rolled over my body, I was able to DO something. So push I did!! Salli gently guided our precious Samuel into this world and promptly passed him to me. And he was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen…

While we allowed the cord to pulse, Rich and I sat there just drinking him in. He cried at the very beginning, but soon calmed down and just looked around in wide-eyed wonder. I couldn’t believe how alert he was. After a little while I delivered the placenta, which I don’t even remember doing, and Rich cut the cord.  I passed Samuel to Rich so he could hold him. And I have to say, watching my husband cradle and look into the eyes of our newborn son while his son looked up at him was so precious to me. I will never forget it.
An herbal bath was prepared for me and Samuel, and nothing felt better than sliding into it and holding Samuel against my chest. After soaking for about 20 minutes, we got out of the tub and Salli did Samuel’s newborn exam. He was 7lbs. and 19.75 inches long. I was shocked!! I had seriously expected a much smaller baby!

The absolute BEST thing about a home birth??? Crawling into bed with my husband and son as everyone left and spending the rest of the day, just the three of us, cuddled together sleeping, talking and soaking in the bliss. I would do it all over again without a second thought. I am so thankful for such a beautiful experience, and for everyone who helped me through it! And should God ever bless our family with another child, Salli will be the first person I call after that positive test!!
My life has been forever changed. I am humbled, ecstatic, and scared to death to be a mother.  My prayer life with be strengthened a hundred fold, no doubt! I am positive Samuel will be my greatest challenge, but he is also my greatest joy.
“On the day you were born I danced over you; on the day you were born I rejoiced. On the day you were born all heaven declared, ‘You’re the child of My love, you’re My choice!’”  — Paul Kyle, “On the Day You Were Born”